Humor

Belgium diss!! Farage rips Von Rumpuy in European Parliament -- charisma of a damp rag, appearance of a bank clerk!!

Submitted by HongPong on Thu, 2010-02-25 04:33

The only redeeming feature of the European Union system is British anti-globalist man of wit Nigel Farage, who rips Von Rompuy, the European Union president, a classic Belgian Reptilian, and noted fan of the New World Order.

MOAR: http://www.economicvoice.com/nigel-farage-calls-herman-van-rompuy-a-damp...

via    http://www.godlikeproductions.com/forum1/message998140/pg1 

  

Classic video: The Website is Down

Submitted by HongPong on Thu, 2009-08-27 18:15

This is just a damn funny video -- featuring a busy techie who needs to play some Halo while fools bug him. A crowd favorite!


Hat tip for Joaquin Phoenix conspiracy

Submitted by HongPong on Sun, 2009-02-15 01:39
Not a bad idea! Which makes this potentially one of the greatest performances any modern actor has ever given -- or at least one of the most baldly courageous. The closest comparison would have to be Andy Kaufman's utter commitment to his obnoxious Tony Clifton persona, but Phoenix is going Kaufman one braver here, by not slapping a fake name on the alter ego bur rather inviting the audience to mistake his damaged doppelganger for himself, over an indeterminate length of time that could leave his "real" career hanging in limbo. There is an end in sight: Phoenix's pal Casey Affleck is shooting all this for what insiders presume is a mockumentary about the breakdown of a burned-out actor. The risk, of course, is how lame it might turn out to be if Phoenix and Affleck remove the masks and say "just kidding" when it's time for their film to finally come out. My hunch is that if they're taking it this far -- and watching Letterman, it was clear that Phoenix is in deep, deep, deep cover -- they might take it all the way into and past the premiere and continue insisting that Phoenix's actorly dissolution was legit. --Huffington Post - Chris Willman

Bill O'Reilly Flips Out — DANCE REMIX

Submitted by HongPong on Fri, 2008-05-16 01:30

YouTube - Bill O'Reilly Flips Out — DANCE REMIX

Sublime! FCC Warning: contains expletives used as a beat and/or rhythm

What can I say?!

CAUCUSTIME 2008: Deez MoineZ New VIDEO!! Walk of Shame!! Iowa Caucus LOSERS 2008 Caucus Time!! GONE!!

Submitted by HongPong on Tue, 2008-01-08 06:44

e taped the Iowa Caucuses and their tragic losers: Bill Richardson, Hillary Clinton, Chris Dodd, Joe Biden and (according to the Captain) Ron Paul. (Sam Donaldson too) We taped them all as they came inside the press convention center, on the walk of shame, mere minutes before their pointless campaigns for president crumbled. Richardson, Dodd, Clinton, Mena Arkansas, the Monkey, COCAINE! they're all here, people. Watch the damn video. It's only 1:20! come on



Part of our continuing series, CAUCUSTIME 2008: Deez MoineZ!!
Yes!!!

Another linkdump for today; the I-35W collapse conspiracies! NAFTA Superhwy news spreads all over!

Submitted by HongPong on Sun, 2007-12-30 02:02

Whichever day that is. In these dark months, you get the drift of active time, as your circadian rhythms get farther and farther from the intervals of natural light.

At least, I sure do, since my job does not require me to show up anywhere at a certain time every day (besides at my computer to send out the Morning Report).

Start here: Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger? Incredible.

WIRED: Phone and email data mining used on War on Drugs. Surprise! AT&T invents a new programming language to parse mass data mining streams, dubbed Hancock.

The always-excellent Cryptogon changed its banner to a NATO tank behind some opium poppies, which is about as apt a geopolitical symbol as you ever need these days.

Hard Times Cafe in Cedar-Riverside is BACK!

So here are a bunch of links to spice your day: Informed Comment: Top Ten Myths about Iraq 2007.

The Charlie Wilson Afghan adventure movie: pretty awesome.

I feel sorry for Pakistan, which was a mistake anyway. What Bhutto's Death Means and Al Qaeda is not taking credit for it. This is big.

Daily Kos: FISA, SCHMISA: DHS Eye in the Sky ready to spy on Americans Related!: TwinCities.com - Inherent powers, ignoble history make new idea anything but innocuous: The Thought Crime thing and also DHS Finalizing Spy Satellite Program To Watch Americans Without Congressional Oversight.

Go here and put in funny searches. You will be amused: CIA FOIA - Overview. Putting in "Barry Seal" is what got me in trouble!

NAFTA Superhighway skepticism dominates leftie interwebs: The existing left-wing blogosphere wisdom is very skeptical: ‘There’s no such thing as a proposed NAFTA Superhighway’ - The Carpetbagger Report

The whole idea was considered bullshit propped up by Jerome Corsi, at least along the left. Example: Crooks and Liars » The NAFTA Superhighway doesn’t exist and ‘There’s no such thing as a proposed NAFTA Superhighway’ - The Carpetbagger Report and Rumors of a Superhighway - New York Times Blog. Also Matthew Yglesias, same thing: Aug 13, 2007 - The Highway That Wasn't there supporting The Nation's skepticism. But there are also impressively ugly 'tinfoil' sites like this one: NAFTA FLAG.

Here are some other random threads about the subject: NAFTA Super HighWay - Canada links to Mexico! - Canada/US Relations - CKA and NAFTA Superhighway - Ready to shit your pants?, and Anomaly Television » Is the North American Union Conspiracy Theory Really Real? Also, Aftermath News had Campaign of mass-deception exposed over NAU-NAFTA Superhighway agenda.

Interestingly, Wikipedia Nafta Super Highway goes to Trans Texas Corridor! Trans-Texas Corridor - Wikipedia.

This seems to be from the same docs that I put out there: Sound Of Cannons: Money From The SuperCorridor: Already Falling Into The Elite's Hands

The latest popular item is: WorldNetDaily: North-of-border link finishes NAFTA superhighway grid

Fake Christians: NAFTA Highway is Holy. This is weirding people out.

So here are just some of the places that the MnDOT docs I got out there ended up:

Oddly it got into what appears to be a White Supremacist forum Vanguard News Network: there are a lot of angry signatures about the Jews... Yeck. New NAFTA NASCO Superhighway Docs released from MnDOT: The whole plan - Vanguard News Network Forum

The grand list of misc Corridor Watch North American Union activists (weirdos?) etc: For your reference!

The I-35W collapse conspiracies! I really have nothing new on this but wanted to put the links anyway. I-35W bridge theories collapse « Mysterious Universe

Don the Drug Smuggling Cowboy.

I received a total of fifteen years for my crimes. Under current law, it would have been much more, perhaps in the neighborhood of twenty years, and I would not be eligible for parole. My children grew up without a father and bear the scars even today.

I think it fair to say that none of us emerged from this business unscathed.

I think it is also fair to say that we all – the smugglers, the dealers and the whores – have been replaced, and that a similar or worse fate awaits the present day crowd involved in the business. And then they will be replaced.

Don Henry Ford is really cool. He wrote stories about his times as a drug smugglin Iran Contra cowboy. And tells everyone good stories @ the Agonist. All right: Cinco Puntos Press: Portrait of a dope-smuggling cowboy by NarcoNews

Speir Publishing runs the fictional account.

Cinco Puntos Press: CONTRABANDO: Confessions of a Drug-Smuggling Texas Cowboy

Reviewed: Austin Chronicle:

He spent seven years smuggling marijuana into the United States over the border from Mexico and somehow lived to write about it. From the dusty streets of dirt-poor mountain villages to the gleaming corruption of the American justice system, Don Henry Ford paints a picture of a business where no hands are clean – it’s that old song about the war nobody wins, only this time it’s being played out of a beat-up old truck as it heads north filled with dope. All but bankrupted after a failed attempt at cotton farming in the 1970s but in possession of an indomitable work ethic and a fierce desire for self-determination, Ford slips into the role of drug smuggler with a nonchalance (“This is too damned easy”) and an audacity you have to marvel at: He just dreams it up and does it, headfirst all the way. Temerity, Ford demonstrates time and again, is the one compulsory attribute of the drug smuggler, and the one he’s most blessed with. The really remarkable thing about Ford and his book isn’t so much the experiences he’s had – his stories probably aren’t all that dissimilar from those of 10,000 of his colleagues – but rather the humanity and philosophical distance he maintains while having them. His sympathy for the plight of the working poor and disenfranchised, regardless of class, color, or country; his distaste for the indifference of the rich and the laws that favor them; his ability to step back and view the larger universe of the war on drugs, and his role in it, through the lens of a class-conscious, homegrown philosophy: They all mark him as a decent man, regardless of his occupation or criminal record. And I’d be willing to guess this kind of sympathy and awareness is rare among those who traffic in illegal narcotics, rarer even than it is among those who don’t. Don Henry Ford’s no saint and no Robin Hood but at the same time, those expecting the self-indulgent confessions of an unrepentant outlaw will be disappointed: Ford’s harder on himself than the legal system and the drug lords ever were. And it’s to his credit that in a business built on dehumanization, he managed to retain his humanity and conscience and see beyond himself to something larger.

And the Austin American Statesman too.

Repossessin' Texas--a review by the author :)

***** MISC LINKS TIME! *****

RNC Protest news for St. Paul 2008: See UnconventionalAction.org . Shh!

Useful: a large set of embedded social bookmarking HTML codes. Slashdot badges. Digg HTML embeds.

SoCal anarchists inherently a fire hazard -> Shutdown!

Cool graphic novels of 2007 - Salon.

For paranoias check out the Main Page - TinWiki.org: the first full-feature Wiki dedicated exclusively to all the topics that inspires the authors to consider "Tin foil hats". Topics such as conspiracy theories, UFO cover ups,extraterrestrial programs, New World Order, Illuminati, secret government programs, top secret bases, and nearly any other "alternative topic" that would cause paranoid fear of the government reprisals, wire taps, and email monitoring are the focus of this collaborative Wiki.

Bear Sterns reaps what they sow.

The war on greed! We Need A War On Greed.

These so-called Al Qaedas in Iraq are by and large from Saudi Arabia according to West Point. What a surprise.

Wall Street like a cockroach - interesting ideas here.

Journalism today! In cartoon form.

Fimoculous.com - misc - Best Blogs of 2007 That You (Maybe) Aren't Reading by the guy that Started Mnspeak. Admittedly I have never heard of many of these blogs but they sounded good. MeFi was snarky on it: Best Blogs of 2007 That You (Maybe) Aren't Readin | MetaTalk

This seemed like a weird site, which had crossposted the SRI thing but also features news about Solar X-Rays in badge form: Scientists on Acid: The Story Behind “Changing Images of Man”

Anonymous email services have been bought out by the NSA. Someone on Digg said "Poor big brother is going to have to read a shitload of Viagra ads." Hah.

Air America Notebooks very complete.

This story has NOTHING to do with ANYTHING: 2,600 Pages of Clinton Records Withheld: These nothings: Barry Seal, Air Contra, and Mena Airport - Ambrose Evans-Pritchard [Free Republic]. Also: Political Friendster - Rose Law Firm - Connections and Political Friendster - Mena, Arkansas 1980's Narcotics Ring - Connections Awesome LOLS!

Best of The MadCowMorningNews:

Kroll makes Blackwater look like wimps

Onion's worst band names of 2007 included local Gay Witch Abortion!

This seemed nuts.

About the NIE - the day the spooks cancelled the Iran war: Cool review in the Guardian. Neo-cons attack. Annapolis Iran schemes noted by ex-CIA honcho Phil Giraldi. The quiet counter-coup.

St. Paul real estate blog.

Say no to GMOs: wow! Klebsiella Planticola almost killed the earth! Synthetic DNA on the Brink of Yielding New Life Forms.

Inside the CIA's notorious black sites.

AFRICOM: the Pentagon's new African fishing expedition.

Link was dropped before: Eisenhower's Farewell Address to the Nation.

The Clusterfuck Nation: Jim Kunstler is the dude when it comes to vaguely apocalyptic visions of social collapse and such. He's The Long Emergency guy. Clusterfuck Nation by Jim Kunstler : A Christmas Eve Story

Making Sense of Ethanol and Related Fuels. | The Agonist

I was advised by someone to look at: John Taylor Gatto - Challenging the Myths of Modern Schooling

Sic Semper Tyrannis 2007: Habakkuk on the neocons' use of intelligence. Very old school.

Get Familiar with Zbigniew Brzezinski // Skilluminati Research

Interest Rate Freeze: Real Story Is Fraud

I just thought this was funny: Bill Clinton Joined Masons When He Was 15

Some stuff: The Dark Face of Populism: Why Paul and Huckabee have had a dramatic rise | The Agonist. I had some rambly response to this.

For the space cadet in all of us: Doug Yurchey's World of Tomorrow

I read this guy's book: DOD Plan: 21st Century Global Police Force

Psychotropic Drug Use Skyrockets 400%

Fun stuff: ROGUEGOVERNMENT.COM - Exposing Government Corruption and the New World Order including CIA Fights Terror With GI Joe Action Figures

The Indypendent » The RAND Corp: Here, There, Everywhere

The planned collapse of America. Why not?

I liked this guy's style: The Bwog: Blogging AIPAC: part one of two and part two of two.

HAARP: The Men who Control the Weather (and vibrated 35W to bits!):

All right, pretty weird stuff. Thanks for joining us!

The cell phone cube of silence; Feds get yr location data without warrants; banned 9-11 blogger KillTown goes too far, scares the RAND Corporation

Submitted by HongPong on Tue, 2007-12-04 22:46

Boston artist Nick Rodrigues developed a cell phone box that you wear. Pretty awesome. Video here. Old news apparently, but sweet. The auto-loader harness that pops it onto your back is nice. Here is another booth made of fabric, not quite as nifty a construction.

[via technabob and notcot]

On the other hand, it turns out that the Feds are tracking you via your cellphone without a warrant. Interestingly, such stuff seemed to be among the deep tinfoil hattery of one whats his face....

On an unrelated subject, outside.in is the new thing in geo-blogging, as in Minneapolis. Storming the News Gatekeepers was pretty funny, but i guess it proves i'm not 31337 enough, because i found Outside.in via the Washington "lame" Post.

Cellphone Tracking Powers on Request - washingtonpost.com:

Cellphone Tracking Powers on Request

Secret Warrants Granted Without Probable Cause

By Ellen Nakashima
Washington Post Staff Writer
Friday, November 23, 2007; Page A01

Federal officials are routinely asking courts to order cellphone companies to furnish real-time tracking data so they can pinpoint the whereabouts of drug traffickers, fugitives and other criminal suspects, according to judges and industry lawyers.

In some cases, judges have granted the requests without requiring the government to demonstrate that there is probable cause to believe that a crime is taking place or that the inquiry will yield evidence of a crime. Privacy advocates fear such a practice may expose average Americans to a new level of government scrutiny of their daily lives.

Such requests run counter to the Justice Department's internal recommendation that federal prosecutors seek warrants based on probable cause to obtain precise location data in private areas. The requests and orders are sealed at the government's request, so it is difficult to know how often the orders are issued or denied.

The issue is taking on greater relevance as wireless carriers are racing to offer sleek services that allow cellphone users to know with the touch of a button where their friends or families are. The companies are hoping to recoup investments they have made to meet a federal mandate to provide enhanced 911 (E911) location tracking. Sprint Nextel, for instance, boasts that its "loopt" service even sends an alert when a friend is near, "putting an end to missed connections in the mall, at the movies or around town."

With Verizon's Chaperone service, parents can set up a "geofence" around, say, a few city blocks and receive an automatic text message if their child, holding the cellphone, travels outside that area.

"Most people don't realize it, but they're carrying a tracking device in their pocket," said Kevin Bankston of the privacy advocacy group Electronic Frontier Foundation. "Cellphones can reveal very precise information about your location, and yet legal protections are very much up in the air."

SHIT! Cell phones are essentially spies in your pocket. And now cops don't need a warrant to use them. | The Agonist

At this point I have to hand it to the so-called Tinfoil Hat crowd, but I can't remember if it was Stew Webb or Tom Flocco. One of these guys is hawking damper bags that can suppress all signal from the NSA scheme that's listening to your mic. For bonus points, here are some random paranoia links of the classic style, sure to entertain the Reynolds Wrap fans. So here are some fun links

Stew Webb. I don't know what happened to Flocco? Tom Flocco.com and his IN BRIEF ARCHIVE

PROFITS OF DEATH--INSIDER TRADING AND 9-11. Acxiom Had Data on 11 of 19 Hijackers

Killtown: Is Barbara Olson still alive? from Killtown, a 9/11 blogger who's keeping it so real that he/she got kicked off practically every big 9/11 blog. Stay black bro!

I seriously have to roll my eyes at how the supposedly open-minded conspiracy crowd has already decided what goes. I mean it could have been holograms and space lasers. Not really very likely, but is it that much less likely than other widely accepted conspiracy theories? I find it funny that they are drawing up these rules against poor Killtown:

Killtown: Banned at AboveTopSecret, public execution style, Killtown: Banned at 911Blogger, Harassment of 9/11 Truth Activists | 911Blogger.com related. www.letsrollforums.com :: View topic - Drone 767 fired missile a split sec B 4 hitting South Tower, Killtown: Banned at Loose Change forum, Killtown's: WTC Crash Videos.

After watching Loose Change: Final Cut in a packed theater, I have to say that sideshow fights like this are a perfect example of everyone missing the forest for the trees. The forum admins should fuckin' chill out a little. Killtown appears to have parsed out all kinds of weird video anomalies. Those deserve their own examination, without bias. Could fake videos ordered up from the Mysterious Cheney Bunker have painted stuff onto America's networks? Sure, why not? See my ramble bits: Internet Radicalization Thought Crimes, Centers of Orwellian Excellence & Strategic Communication Laboratories: What Modules are in the OpCentre?

I almost forgot to add the piece de resistance: Killtown's website got put up alongside 'Al Qaeda' websites as examples of evil internet radicalization. KEEPING IT REAL. Definitely. The Alex Jones Krew noted: House Subcommittee Presentation Equates 9/11 Truth With Terrorism, and here:

To paraphrase Chomsky or HS Thompson or something: You're not really fighting the system till you're on the RAND Corporation's shit list!

A dubious away message

Submitted by HongPong on Sun, 2007-11-18 18:23

I wondered what "res ipsa loquitur" meant. HS Thompson used it a lot. Now I see why: it means "the thing speaks for itself."

So behold this Scalia joke:

Not all of the justices admit to being so nervous, however. Asked to assess his prospects for losing his virginity within the next two months, a confident Scalia lifted his judicial robe and quipped, "Res ipsa loquitur."

Other funny stuff for today: Cracked.com has actually got a pretty good deal going for good humor stuff. Consider the actually quite disconcerting 10 Ways Online Gaming Will Change the Future.

Also, The 8 Least-Threatening Comic Book Villains, The Ultimate War Simulation Game, The Best (Worst) Fantasy & Science Fiction Book Covers.

Some more really good stuff included: The Next 9 Children's Characters That Should Come Out of the Closet, The 25 Most Baffling Toys From Around the World, and finally, The 9 Most Racist Disney Characters. Great!

Eh that's all for now. I finally got the heat fixed in my apartment. Turned out the radiator pipes were full of air. Now it's hot as hell in here. The door to my barely-insulated porch can even be left open with no ill effect!

Impressive Japanese Rube Goldberg device

Submitted by HongPong on Mon, 2007-09-10 14:37

Yes folks it's been quite a while since I checked in at this marvelous website. In a nutshell.... Ugh, i use that nutshell cliche too much.

In the big picture... outside the box, in a whole new paradigm, rightsized... Eh. I am moving into Minneapolis tomorrow on the ominous date of September 11. Fortunately I have scored a nifty 1BR in Stevens Square, which is an obscure neighborhood around Franklin Avenue, near Nicollet. Basically between Uptown, Downtown and Phillips. It's pretty close to the center of my various clusters of friends that I don't adequately stay in touch with.

In Stevens Square, there is a strong wave of condo-conversion happening, a key indicator the area is gentrifying and experiencing some kind of spike in land values as professionals want to live near downtown.

It is not the most practical for my job, since the office is in St. Paul, though I do a lot of work from home as well.

For the most part, during August I have been living on friends' couches, emerging reeking of cigarettes and lacking regular showers. Really attractive. This translates to 'any kind of blogging is a big hassle, and I really don't care that much right now.'

In other news, Ron Paul has thus far won an impressive 70% of the HongPoll, as he often does. However the media blackout plan remains in full effect. Huzzah: The number-two vote getter at 6% was "Someone not on my list (A subtle censoring to consolidate establishment power)". Teh Sweet.

I have been in a tricky spot lately, as my illustrious boss at Politics in Minnesota has been on a vacation for the last couple weeks, so I got to mastermind the last issue of the Weekly Report, and this upcoming one, as well. Not too bad!!

Pirates and Emperors: Schoolhouse Rock - because those liberal freaks go to far!!!

Submitted by HongPong on Thu, 2007-03-08 09:27

Here is a Schoolhouse Rock style version of Iran-Contra and everything else. Hilarious!


The old Schoolhouse Rock videos are all over YouTube. Here's the classic about how a bill becomes a law:


And here's the Simpson's Followup decades later, an Amendment to Be!

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